Lies, Deception and Inconsistency ... So I give to you *this*

According to my last post, there should have been a follow-up of the Christmas Wish-List. But as you can see, there isn't one.

This will mark the end of my unkept promises and dealies. Don't get me wrong, that doesn't mean I will start doing more frequent and periodical updates, it just means that I will not promise you anything.

So in place of my missing Christmas List entries, I give you *this*.

I will make this promise though, this will make you laugh, hard ... off your ass.

MERRY ... belated ... CHRISTMAS!

Christmas List #1 (Closet Jockey - 1st drawer)

It's that time of year again; take your credit cards out shoppers!. Shop till you drop, literally. Whether you drop from the weight of your overflowing shopping bags, or from feeling feint upon realizing your credit bill, either way, fun is fun right?

Christmas is a holiday for three things.

número 1: Spending time with your loved ones.
número 2: Sharing gifts for your loved ones.
número 3: Making unrealistic lists of things you want to get/receive for your beloved self

I personally love #3, for it stays close to my heart. Heart of impulsive spending. I started making my lists already, but you know, it's all for fun. No pressure on those who are planning on getting me Christmas presents; no pressure at all. But just in case you haven't noticed the things I like, *ahem*, might want to refer to the list below. Not that you have to get me these things, but you know...like I said... just for fun.

Oh, Alexander McQueen, I can kiss you; for his McQ line, not for sexual reasons...unless *thinks too hard*. I can now, proudly, afford Alexander McQueen's collection. Not his luxe, would-die-for-to-even-have-the-opportunity-of-wearing, sets, but his down-to-earth and affordable collection known as, say it with me now, McQ. The checked pea-coat with quilt lining, pictured to the left, is just awesome. It's casual enough to go with my jeans, which reminds me... Note to self: go buy more jeans, and yet if needed, I can probably hit it up with my newly purchased Mexx wool-tucked pants. I would love to match this coat with legit McQueen skull wool scarves, but I can't find them anywhere. Well, I could find them on ebay, but I can't trust ebay with brand name clothes; neither should you. As a guilty, also random, thought; one of my Starbucks customers had the perfect rip-off of the scarf, which he said he bought from Urban Outfitters. I should really check that out, and if it looks as good up close as it did from a feet distance between the customer-tipper and me, why not get the fake? I normally wouldn't do this, but hey it's not my fault. It's McQueen's fault for not making enough scarves to get around to me. This is some old-fashion self-loving right here *uh huh + snap snap*. Anywho, back on topic. Since I haven't seen these peacoats anywhere, except for the website, I am going to use my instincts here...

Price: U$200 (approximately)

The things I would do for a full attire set of Armani, you wouldn't want to know. Well, since this is a wishlist, I shall wish hard upon a floating star that my dreams may come true with a single stroke of winning the lottery. To the left, you can see one of Armani's perfected contraptions suited to fit a man with the physique to pull it off. I don't mean to brag, well I guess ... a little, but I do think that I am one of those people; this is 'self-proclaimed' but I stand by it damn it. The overtop is a waisted, non-stripe suit; under which lies a french-collar dress shirt, with concealed buttons; ontop of which rests a 6.5 cm flattened velvet tie; and below it all is the wide-tucked, straight drop, silk-velvet-mix dress pants. You know what? Heck, it's a wishlist - let's add a slim-stainless-steel Armani watch with croco leather. Fuck it, why not go there? Let's just throw in a low-boot in black croc print, go the full mile. And there you have it, the suit + watch combo that I constantly dream about on a daily basis. Mucho! On a sidenote, I would normally suggest away from wearing a full attire of the same brand/designer, but hey, its Armani. He does the thinking part of putting together attires. If you could afford it, why the hell not?

Price: U$2431 ($1015 suit + $375 shirt + $98 tie + $348 pants + $145 watch + $450 shoes)

Though I would love to continue on with more things that I want for myself, and not you *insert hearty laugh*, I do have other things to do today (ie. sleep, so I can get to work on time tomorrow morning). But do not be troubled citizen, for the jasongg (yes, the jasongg) will return with more pointless blabbing of self-fulfillment through buying, or thinking of buying, totally unneccessary brands of merchandize. Then it's farewell until, I don't know, let's say ... *twiddles fingers* ... tomorrow.

Hey?! Where is my TomKat marriage blog-entry?

It doesn't exist. And it won't exist ever. Reason? I don't feel like it. Enough celebrity stuff for now. I am trying to find something other than gossip and glam topics to write about.

This is a seemingly hard task, considering that there is so much happening as of late that are tempting me to go back to celebrity-washed write ups (Reese Witherspoon's divorce with Ryan Phillippe, all the Madonna garbage, follow up to Britney's divorce with ... whomever etc...).

But temptation shall not get the best of me! *runs to eat chocolate, lots and lots of chocolate*

Sexiest Man Alive. Again.

It's that time of the year again. To most magazine fanatics this is as big as Christmas itself (which is coming at an extremely fast pace - must shop for 'presents'...yes). People magazine has put out its list of the hottest men alive in the entertainment business today. Most of the honorees were old-place-takers that have been on the list for years and years before. Some newcomers are refreshing faces to the roster. I was glad to see one specific person on the list this year (and no it is not the korean guy) because it truly shows that true 'hotness', like beauty, can be from the inside.

From here on, all you girls, and some boys, will be showered with what is called 'eye-candy' and 'visual-weed' which you will suck up and enjoy to the point of drunkard-ness. Not a word, but it's a funny phrase. Drunkard-ness.

George Clooney

Here he is folks, the sexiest man alive, again, in the year 2006. I swear, George Clooney is one of the few people in Hollywood who get sexier as they get older (the other celebrity worth mentioning of similar characteristics is Johnny Depp *drool*). When I saw him on ER he wasn't a 'OH MY GOD' hot, but when I saw him on Ocean's Eleven, well I think the world agrees when I say that most girls would have 'tapped' that *wink wink*. He already has the title under his belt from 1997 (also one of the two celebrities who won it twice in their careers, the other being Brad Pitt, who I think is overrated), but now I guess he can update his crown-and-glory, because being hot in 2006 is a lot harder than it was in 1997. You don't agree? Go google up Sexiest Man Alive 1997 and compare that to the current. I think it is self explanatory. I am, in one way, glad he won, because he is not only a looker, but has a personality of a bunny: approachable and ... cuddly. He is the rare-breed of celebrities who doesn't mind getting poked fun of. Not only that, he would constantly join in and poke fun at himself. To top it off, he is 'anti-swag' (as People puts it). Why can't every other rich man be this down-to-earth? If all the celebrities were like Clooney we would be happier as fan-goers. Once again, to recap, George Clooney is this year's sexiest man alive.

My name is Jasong and I approve of this message *thumbs up*.

Patrick Dempsey

The man who has undergone the one of industry's greatest comebacks of all time. With less-than-average roles in TV pilots in the 1990's, where the shows didn't last more than a season, he was on a spiral of celebrity-doom (what I like to call "The Hole of Andy Dick"). But I guessed we spoke to soon, for he booked one of the greatest roles in TV history by pulling off the role of Dr. Derek Shepherd (aka. Dr. McDreamy) on the hit TV series, Grey's Anatomy. I personally don't think he is as hot as people hype him up as, but gotta give the man some props for his amazing career kick-back. But still, I don't fully agree with him being on the list, but that is just me.

Ashton Kutcher

Oh Ashton Kutcher. He can play a dumbass on a TV show at one moment and play a totally righteous rescue-unit at another. Multitalented actor, I don't care who says otherwise, and a hottie to boot. Like George Clooney in Ocean's Eleven role, a lot of girls probably giggled and jumped when they saw Kutcher in tighty-jeans in That 70's Show. Married to Demi Moore, who I think has lost her 'glow' which is beside the point, he lives a pretty stable relationship and life. Total moron on TV, but a socialized, and even sophisticated at times, individual whenever not under the pressure of the camera, Kutcher takes his place as #3 on the list.

Taye Diggs

An underdog, if you will, in the TV industry. You will probably remember him, or from now on anywho, from the much anticipated TV pilot-mini-series, Day Break on ABC. Don't let his lack-luster celebrity status fool you, this man is not new to the game. He has been on the roles of the minor characters in several TV shows (such as Ally McBeal) and movies (more notable role as Benjamin "Benny" Coffin in the musical-turned-movie Rent). Diggs pulls off the Mr.Chocolate in the list, and he pulls it off well. Mmmm Chocolate.

Johnny Depp

World isn't fair. If there were levels of asthetic pleasure in a male's outer looks it would be in this order: ugly, mediocre, hottie, perfect and there is Johnny Depp in bold, glowing letters with fireworks and midgets on tigers. If I had it my way, Johnny Depp would win this honor for years and years and years. I don't know when I would stop listing him as #1, because he is the, and I mean "the", hottest man alive right now. If I were a girl, or gay, I would destroy a small town to be with him. Stunning good looks, successful career, stunning good looks, great personality, stunning good looks - there is little to hate about this guy. Oh yeah, he is a devoted father as well (when he wore the shirt which his daughter scribbled on...just wow, now that is fatherhood) - just in case the few points listed before didn't get your motors going. Depp takes #5 in the list, but shall remain as #1 in the hearts of many.

There you have it folks, those were the top 5 of People's Hottest Man Alive of 2006. Now that you have read through all that male-grabbing-compliments (you did read them didn't you?) you might be wondering who I was referring to in the beginning about an individual on the list who truly gave the meaning of inner-beauty. It is this man, an honorary mention, if you will.

John Krasinski

Best known, probably, for his role in the hilarious TV sitcome The Office on NBC, starring as the lovable Jim Halpert. This dude, in my humble opinion, isn't the sexiest man alive. If it were just facial and physical features, he would be very low on this list, if on it at all. But this man truly has the inner hotness - which in this case is humour. He is the type that you love, not because he is bulging with mucles and well toned abs and face, because he is so down-to-earth and realistic that you wouldn't even guess that he was a celebrity on national television. In his defense of being a sex-symbol, he does have one hell of a height in his corner - 6"3? That is a lot of man to love. I love this man. Glad that he got the well deserved spot as #9.

The list continues on to include more too-good-to-be-true male celebrities: Leonardo DeCaprio (he is making a big comeback, I swear), Jake Gyllenhaal (I can already hear the screams of 1000 fangirls - who can resist his eyes? WHO?), John Cho (go Korean man!) and others. If you want the full online cover of this spectacle, you might want to visit it up here.

I hope that this article has brought to you unrealistic standards of men. Or if you already had such standards, I hope that this article further enforced the thought. Keep it up, and you might just end up finding a man like these in the next few years - or more likely, you will die a lonely and broken woman (or man). Until next time - mucho.

No more Mr.Spears. Back to Mr..umm..K-fed..? Fuck it, who cares.

And it is official. Britney has dumped the good-for-nothing-gangster-wannabe-rapper-failure-and-a-laughing-stock-of-the-music-industry-good-for-nothing-gangster-wannabe-rapper...K-Fed. What took her so long? I blame the hick-aura of Federline obstructing her eyes and thoughts. Also, Britney is not the brightest penny in the pond.

I wonder who will walk out the winner in this divorce. It should be pretty obvious to everyone, but just in case you can't keep score on your own, let me help you out here. Let's do a count-check.

Who has a realistic future career in the business? Britney.
Who doesn't have a future career in anything? K-Fed

Who is keeping all the fortune due to a smart move on the prenup? Britney.
Who is the retard that loses everything? K-Fed.

Who's the chick? Britney.
Who's the hick? K-Fed.

So thats 3:0 for Britney. Pretty one-sided. Biased? Maybe. Accurate? Probably. Agreeable? Duh.

What I find most amusing is what Federline is gonna do with his album. It is already probably sitting at the counter @ Wal-Mart in a 'Bargain Bin' but some of the things must be changed, or altered. If he doesn't, the album will look more pathetic than it already is (which borders 'impossible'). Once again, let's recap:

1. The song title, The World is Mine. No, it isn't. Anymore.
2. The song title, Dance with a Pimp.That's your future job to finance you dinners at McDonalds.
3. The song title, Privilege. You don't got any.
4. The song title, Crazy. Yes, you are
5. The lyrics, "No tuxedo 'cause they recognize me, A lifestyle of rich living and fast cars, Don't hate 'cause I'm a superstar, And I married a superstar, Never come between us no matter who you are". ... Now I am beginning to feel sympathetic for the dude

No one was surprised at the stand-cover-article regarding the split. So I am not going to give further input in the situation.

Final note, the divorce paper documents cite "irreconcilable differences" as the reason for the break-up. In other words? Kevin is a sit-at-home-dad, and Britney is a sit-at-home-mom-but-with-money.

Film. Recapped.

Movies, the manifestation of images and ideas into an observable media that is smooth on the visuals, pleasing in audio and magnificent in presentation. Creation of such medium is not easy, or at least it shouldn't be, and even harder to perfect. 'Perfect', a term you can rarely use to describe the theatrical output of recent years.

No one can deny that the quality of these 'films' have been mediocre, at best, as of late. Movies not judged based on quality of the production, but more emphasis given to the actors, celebrities, the fandom-marshals which have redefined a 'successful' movie in regards to the collection of mulah. Less attention given to the script, dialogue and the ambiance and more given to graphics, flashy-action and celebrity cameos. Since when has movies become a tool of business marketing, rather than a praise-worthy piece of the cultural/social identity?

Not all is lost, however. This is not always the case. Every now-and-then, a masterpiece reveals itself to the public. Whether it is tops the box-office or not, who cares? It gives us a refreshing recap of what film was, is and continues to be (on rarer occasions). These films deliever the true gift of of media: makes us reflect, triggers emotion and most importantly, allow us to endulge ourselves in the core-centre of the media itself.

Below is my personal list of favourite movies/movie scenes, Top 5 Movie Scenes, in no particular order. These movies are what have defined the standards of film in my book. The movies and the scenes below are 5 of the greatest 3-5 minutes ever produced in the industry. I loved these selections because of their unique play on words, utilizing the undeniably talented actors who, unfortunately, aren't the most sought out of the bunch and overall 'aura' it creates as the film is played.

25th Hour

Ed Norton. One of the best actors in the business, and this scene is proof of that. No one can use the word "Fuck" in a way where it is not used for the sake of swearing, but sending the message about how the world is ... 'fucked'. Most intriguing scene in the whole movie, which means alot regarding the overall quality of every frame in this film. Not an understatement to say, the greatest monologue ever created in the industry. Warning: this scene may offend virgin ears.

Closer

Chick Flick? Yes. But a great Chick Flick. Awesome cast (Natalie Portman, Clive Owen, Julia Roberts, Jude Law), awesome plot and the most well-thought dialogue/script I have heard yet in the genre. My favourite scene would have to be the whole dialogue between Julia Roberts and Jude Law (it is also in the clip):

Julia Roberts: Why did you swear eternal love when all you wanted was excitement? Love bores you.

Jude Law: No, it dissapoints me.

Why did I link a trailer instead of a clip? Simply put, the whole movie is a masterpiece that deserves to be posted here. I loved every single second of this movie, no exaggeration. So to give you the best idea of the movie, I decided to put the trailer, instead of fighting myself to pick one of the dozens of favourite scenes. Actually, if I could pick one scene, it would be where Portman speaks about photos and how they are 'fake' (but I can't find it >_<). Also on a last note, Clive Owen is a man's man.

Snatch

Snatch is, to me, an upgraded version of Ocean's Eleven (another great movie, but not on the list). All mix-match of events, and all interlinked in the ending moments of the entire film. Well produced, well scripted, perfectly cast - another "two thumbs up" movie. The scene with my favourite character in the whole film, Bullet-tooth Tony (played by Vinnie Jones), is hilarious. That's it. Hilarious. Watch. Laugh. And laugh again.

The Devil's Advocate

Have you seen this movie? You better have. One of, if not, the greatest movies of all time. Al Pacino makes up for the impotence of Keanu Reeves. I swear, Keanu has a acting potential of a "brick". It's a 1/2 cast, as I like to call. Truly intriguing piece of work of the vision of satan. Warning: this scene may offend you if you are the extreme religion type.

Love Actually

Ok, I will admit. This movie was not one of the best movies or scenes ever made. Make this one a guilty-pleasure insert. Honestly, the sweetest scene in the whole movie. It tops as one of my favourite chick-flick-feel-good-moment scenes of all time. Keira looks weird in this one, but honestly I don't care. The scene is that good, to a point where Oprah could've been standing at the door and I wouldn't care. Why? It's all about Andrew Lincoln or Mark in the movie.

"To me you are perfect."

So cheesy and so memorable. If you need a chick-flick (for personal needs and/or for a movie-night-in with your girlfriend, take this one, trust me).

"Do the (red) thing"

Yes. Let's all do the (red) thing.

Have you walked down Bloor lately? It is nearly impossible to walk down the street without, even for a second, glancing at the bit**in' amount of red that is just plastered all over the windows of GAP.

Ok. I get it. Red is in. Now shut it!

GAP has its ways with advertisement. From their 'Audrey' theme (used prior to the current (red) image) to the whole 'black-and-white-in-your-face-celebrity-endorsement-posters', they continuously manage to catch your interest. To me, this whole 'red' thing didn't seem any different from their previous attempts (and success attempts at that) to lure me, and my ever-thinning-wallet, in. Before moving on the my next point, let's just emphasize. GAP has an awesome advertisement/marketing team on their benches. C'mon, Audrey Hepburn (may she rest in peace) posters? They rocked several socks, along with other inner wearables (boxers or briefs? ... Yes, you have to pick one of the two).

My initial reaction, above, now seems shallow, now that I know what was actually represented in the still photos of celebrities dressed in, well, red.

Africa and AIDS. We all heard about it, whether it be through magazines, papers, TV and the not-so-frequently-used-radio but not a lot of us take action or the initiative to help the cause. Well, I, as much as I am embarrased to say, haven't done anything on my part to solve the ever-growing problem. But GAP has just opened my dilemma encrusted door and gave me a true opportunity to do my share (as well as satisfy my need to shop).

Project RED is a charity venture started by Bono (of U2), partnered with several brand-name labels: Motorola, American Express, Emporio Armani, Converse, Apple and the ever so growing GAP. With exclusive product lines designed specifically for this 'charity', a percentage (or a fixed sum) of the profits made on the sales of these merchandizes will be donated to finance the AIDS-relief-effort in Africa, Global Fund. Personally I am not a big fan of Bono. I think of him as a two-faced-hypocrite; playing the whole 'globally thoughtful' individual in the major medias, while playing his financial cards against the governmental support systems behind the curtains. But my dislike towards on being should not deter me and my desire to do good. And it hasn't.

To those who are wondering what I bought for this 'philanthropic' spending of mine, it was this sexy, and well needed, number. I would've bought myself a jacket, or anything more expensive to support this campaign, but this little piggy is empty. Insert more coins to continue.

For those who are truly interested in giving to the needy through this well-advertised project, I would highly recommend that you do buy something from GAP over the other handful of labels. Reason? Simply put, GAP is giving a generous 50% of the profits to the cause, while others are giving much less (ie. Apple with their dingy $10 per iPod sales - do they not realized how ridiculously overpriced they are?). Who am I to judge, however? These brands, regardless of the amount, are doing something for the global-well-being. So kudos to all those participating.

For those who are interested in checking out the products of each label, I have collected the link for you to abuse, I mean use, below. Clickity click.



And for those who didn't agree with me in regards to GAP's amazing advertisement imaging, enjoy the below thumbnailed goodness. If I see these posters up on the TTC, I will have to take them, for that is what I do - take pretty posters without consent. *runs from the TTC police*